20-05-2021 00.13

 So hey guys,

I guess I have officially summer vacation from now on. Damn... Four years of tears, hard work, depression times, family problems, friend problems, self-believe problems, delays, grey days, problems with love, smiley days, new friendships, sunny days... everything.

I am officially done with my bachelor's degree, and about to enter my master's degree after summer 2020. It will be another ride, I will for sure make myself ready to move on. I have to say that, I did not interpret my future like that before moving to another city to reach my goals.

I have grown a lot, I have gained a lot of experience in all aspects of life. And I know I still have a lot to learn from, and it is fine. But what I have still a hard time realizing from time to time, is that I like to be in control and have control over different situations. I like to make a plan and make my life go as the plan I have made. But I know, that you make a plan put the process will change every second, so there is nothing that is called The Plan because The Plan is your life's journey.

I have also a hard time, accepting my past, such as about the last man that came into my life. I still miss him and think about him, I can at times also get tears in my eyes. But I know, and I have realized that 4-5 years of on and off, back and forward was so toxic for me and him, that everything ends on being addicted to each other in an unhealthy way. I love him, I miss him, I wish truly and really that he could be my one and only, but if my life is not meant to be with him God it is alright. I am trying my best to the best version of myself every day. It is hard for me to keep up at times, to wake up and energetic and live another day with my dream in the back of my head.

There are so many challenges in life that will hit you so hard, that you sometimes will forget who you are, and what your plan is, or what to were chasing...

God please, make me stronger and strengthen my skill to be the strongest managing woman in the universe, and I am talking about A strong managing woman in life, family, work, friendship .. everything. I trust I believe, and I have faith in you God/Universe.

#AuntyIMissYou

I never had time to say thank you for everything, and for building me the strong me that I am today. I miss you. I am doing everything in my power to make you happy because I miss you and I love you. I hope that has not let you down... I swear I am trying and doing my best.