It has been two days now, my father is visiting my and my sisters. And I am at my sisters now. My mind has been thinking in alot of direction and different aspect of my future. I miss the days, where nothing els matters. I was only about dreams and fun times, and to do what you like and just embrace it.
I am only 24 years old, and I am about to be 25 years old this year. This feeling that I have right now, I had it when I was 19 probably 20 years old. I swear the last 3-4 years, my mind and personality life made me push some limits, some of it were so hard at first and ofcourse I did not understand, but I understand why, and I am still searching for a meaning about why things still is the way it is. I can tell, I have more control over myself and my mind, my action. I am more sure about, what to do, what not to do, what I want, what I do not want. Not that I am 100% sure, no, but most of the time. There is always those days and hours, were you do not feel well or are yourself. I swear I went totally on autopilot for the last 3-4 years, trying to figure me out and live for me, not what other have to say about my lifestyle or please another human, just to be loved. Loosing yourself, to make another human being happy, for sake of not being judges but loved, took me years to figure out. And I can tell, I have moments were I can fall back again, but I have still 100+ more step away from the hell whole and the I pushed myself into and stayed.
I believe that each individual have their own problems and life to attented and take care of. What I wish and want you guys to take away with you, and always remember, and like my dad always says "wear it forever like you earing", live your live by any means, just do what makes YOU happy no matter what it cost or what it takes away from you. It does NOT matter, as long as YOU are happy!
Ingen kommentarer:
Send en kommentar