Yesterday, I was so sad - that I cried myself to sleep. i could feel that I was holding on to many emotion, mixed emotions, everything - and I was just trying to stay strong and going on around with a cold stoned heart, and feelings so numb and emotionless .. You know, I do not know.
I see many people going on with their life - and I am like .. if life is like this I do not want to live it. I do not want to live it like this, and go through a proces to get to know me better. Why can not I not have him by my side.
I know we literally are from to different worlds, and I know that our past is so messed up that it can never be the same again, because things has been said and done, there is no form of kindness or respect for each other - Even though I know this that he loves me, by the way he were though love, and I love him by the way I was though how to love .. but we just collabed in other stages, that he is still my baby. He is still my love. He is still my everything - and it makes me sad so much that it is just the way it is.
And I know his friends or sorroundings do not want us together or help him to become better him, and it is okay .. Oh .. my just so up in my feelings that I could cry all day - and it has been for a long time, that I was not attached to my feelings like this ..
God is it possible, that I somehow still want him for me - eventhough I know it is so impossible.
God you know, that deep in my heart he still is my boo thang.
God you know, that deep in my heart he still is my boo thang.
Ying To My Yang. MyForever <3.
He does not want to have anything to do with me, and it is okay.
It is how it is know, you will be apart of my future from here now on..
Happy Birthday Yesterday Love - Take Care - You are in my prayers, always.
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