03-01-2014 - 22:45

I am not HAPPY. I AM NOT N - O - T .. not .. NOOOOT .. happy. I do not know why I suddenly have these up and down emotional times. I am so sad right now, that I hate everything, everybody, everything this words is created of. I hate myself more than everything. I HATE THAT I LIVE. I JUST HATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If I die young:
- I will thank God
- I will be so much happier
- I will be gone
- There will be no me
- There will be no drama
- There will be no struggle

Funny when you are dead people will listen to you there .. but not before.... And suddenly everybody cares, and actually get tears in their eyes.

Maybe I am out of my mind, maybe I don't appreciate things around me. And maybe you think that I am some kind of unthankful person who don't know how to appreciate the life, and comparing my life with a child born in a poor community, my life is heaven. Maybe you think like that ..Yes it is, but the poor child life it SURE HELL ISN'T mental break down. You sure hell aren't prisoned in ur parents home, You sure hell aren't doing things that you are forced to. And you sure hell can do thing that you want to do, not that what they want you to do.

T A K E M E A W A Y G O D P L E A S E

:( .......................